Premature ejaculation: when time catches up with us
Ejaculating prematurely can be a major problem for men who experience it. The situation can be frustrating and embarrassing, in addition to having a “snowball” effect, because the more it happens, the more anguish it generates and it is that anguish that promotes more episodes of premature ejaculation.
How much is “too soon”?
Premature ejaculation is generally understood as ejaculation that is too early. However, has anyone measured with a stopwatch in hand when it is “too soon”?
There is no parameter that indicates whether intercourse should last 5 minutes, half an hour or two hours, the time it takes for penetration is infinitely variable depending on the people involved, the circumstances and the practices.
For all this, it is better to talk about premature ejaculation as a lack of control over the expulsion of semen (often simultaneous to the male orgasm). That is, if the man detects that the desire to ejaculate is increasing, but he is not able to relax and stop the impulse, it is this loss of control that is considered premature ejaculation.
If you wanted your orgasm to take longer and didn’t, then it was too soon for you (and maybe, but not necessarily, for your partner).
A psychological problem
The lack of control over ejaculation has, most of the time, a psychological and not an organic origin. Some men worry because they don’t know if they will perform “good” sexually, and the great desire to satisfy their partner puts too much stress on them. Paradoxically, this concern for “looking good” influences to obtain the exact opposite result.
To solve the problem and try to feel more confident, many men seek all kinds of remedies to delay ejaculation. The so-called “retardant creams” contain mainly local anesthetics, which will kill sexual stimuli, but most likely they will do so to such a degree that the man no longer feels anything and loses his erection. Without an erection there is no ejaculation, but neither is intercourse.
The condom will be your best ally
An easy, affordable remedy that also provides protection against infections is the condom. But not just any condom, but those that are thicker, so that they really decrease the sensation on the skin of the penis.
That’s right, what many men use as a pretext for not using condoms can work in your favor and provide you with other additional benefits, since in addition to feeling more confident for that extra help, you can rest assured that you will protect yourself against sexually transmitted infections ( STIs) such as HIV and others.
You can also find other options such as condoms that promise a retarding effect, but you must be careful because if the substance that is mixed with the lubricant has some anesthesia, your partner will also suffer the consequences. And thinking about it like this, it doesn’t make much sense to prolong a penetration where neither of them is feeling anything.
Seek specialized support
Premature ejaculation is a problem related to anxiety, which comes from it but also generates it. For this reason, it is essential that you go to a specialist to solve the situation. Said specialist can be a sex therapist who helps you clarify your fears and prejudices to live a healthier sexuality, or a sexologist who treats this condition.
The important thing is that you know how to identify if premature ejaculation is a problem that affects your sexual life, and then find a way to solve it at its root. But in the meantime, no one could advise against using a condom, not only to prolong your sexual relations a little longer, but also to be the barrier that will prevent you from getting an STI.
Remember that if you want free condoms, at AHF Latin America and the Caribbean we have them for you, and we also carry out HIV detection tests at no cost. Just come to our offices in your country or write to us by Whatsapp and learn about all our services.